10.15198/seeci.2016.39.162-183
RESEARCH

EDUCATION IS LOVE AND SELF-REALIZATION

EDUCAR ES AMAR Y AUTORREALIZARSE

Gloria Gallego-Jiménez¹ Professor at the International University of La Rioja two subjects: personalized education and civic education inside and outside the classroom. Director and Editor of Works Final Grade. Ed.D.
Magda Bosch-Rabell²

¹International University of La Rioja Spain
²International University of Catalonia. Spain

ABSTRACT
This piece of research addresses the reflective topic of education focused on the person. It usually gives much importance to education as a mere teaching-learning process as outlined in the recent past studies and inadvertently forgets what is fundamental: Education is love and self-realization. They currently study the process of methodologies that take place as there has been a reversal of roles between teachers and students. However, the educational action concerns individuals and is an aid to their development and improvement. Educating agents always want, through dialogue or other communication, to seek the good of the student, his fullness of life: self-realization. The most characteristic feature which shows the dignity of man is freedom, choice and will. This is made possible by knowledge and love, sensitive and intellective. This article deals with a reflection on love which must be consistent with the intelligence and the will to carry out comprehensive education. The rationale enables a person to perform processes of abstraction through communication with their environment, achieving flexible and efficient approach that allows us to discern critically.

KEYWORDS: knowledge, love, freedom, affectivity, feelings, self, realization, will

RESUMEN:
La presente investigación aborda la temática reflexiva sobre la educación centrada en la persona. Se suele dar mucha importancia a la educación como un mero proceso de enseñanza-aprendizaje como señalan en lo últimos estudios recientes y sin darse cuenta se olvida lo fundamental: Educar es amar y autorrealizarse. Actualmente se observan estudios realizados sobre el proceso de metodologías que se llevan a cabo ya que ha supuesto un cambio de papeles entre profesores y alumnos. Sin embargo, la acción educativa se refiere a la persona y supone una ayuda para el desarrollo y perfeccionamiento de ésta. Los agentes educadores quieren siempre a través del diálogo o de otro tipo de comunicación el bien del educando, su plenitud de vida: la autorrealización. El rasgo más propio que evidencia la dignidad del hombre es la libertad, la capacidad de elección y de querer. Esto es posible por su conocimiento y amor, sensible e intelectivo. Este artículo realiza una reflexión sobre el amor que debe estar en consonancia con la inteligencia y la voluntad para llevar a cabo una educación íntegra. La racionalidad capacita a la persona para que realice procesos de abstracción a través de la comunicación con su medio, consiguiendo una actitud flexible y eficaz que permita discernir de una manera crítica.

PALABRAS CLAVE: conocimiento, amor, libertad, afectividad, sentimientos, autorrealización, voluntad

Recibido: 29/12/2015
Aceptado: 22/02/2016

Correspondence: Gloria Gallego Jiménez International University of La Rioja. Spain
gloria.gallego@unir.net
Magda Bosch Rabell: International University of Catalonia. Spain
mbosch@uic.es

1. INTRODUCTION

Currently, recent studies of education (Robert J, Swartz et al 2013; Journal of Education 21st century 2015, p 35-36) Special emphasis is made on the methodology in teaching. This article aims to highlight the central aspect of education, which is love and self-realization. It is one of the characteristics that distinguishes man from other beings in the universe, hence the fact that education starts from the birth of the human being, before actual intelligent and free acts become evident.
Anthropology considers man in his dual aspect of being an organic animal and being a creator of culture, culture being understood as learned, not genetically inherited knowledge. Culture will be the improvement of the physical, intellectual and moral faculties of man. This statement follows that unlike animals, man is in a privileged position, he builds something alive, his own self and his own destiny. He is both the material and the artist. His improvement requires the concept of personal interaction since man is a social being by nature, he is situated within a culture and needs others to fulfill himself.
A distinguishing feature between man and other living beings is his ability to be educated, which means the progressive improvement of his qualities and individual circumstances.
The educational action refers to the person and is an aid to his development and refinement. Educating agents always want, through dialogue or other communication, to seek the good for the learner, his fullness of life: self-realization. An ideal student could be defined, schematically, with the following features (. Maslow, A., 1989, p 148-149) he is satisfied, he accepts himself, he has a clear and efficient perception of reality, he is open to experiences, he is spontaneous and expressive. He behaves naturally and with simplicity. He has a great capacity to solve all kinds of problems. He is autonomous and independent. He has continued ability to enjoy life. Interpersonal relations are good. He has a wealth of emotional reaction. He is in a good mood. He is creative and original. He has a great capacity to love. He accepts changes in the scale of social values. He is identified with the problems of others.
A person who fully matches this definition does not exist, self-fulfillment is a process that does not end but is continuous throughout a person’s life.
The feature of education is that it refers to the person, and this is not developed only by purely physical laws but also by psychic laws as conscience and freedom. Therefore, there are three fundamental attitudes: an increase in the values ??that the subject possesses and perfects; awareness by the subject of the progressive achievement of these objectives; active cooperation, an action, which involves taking free and concrete action. For this reason, it is advisable to educate by choice. The student, when choosing, or rather the teacher when e letting the student choose a type of learning methodology or another, is getting an education based on freedom.

2. OBJECTIVES

The specific objectives of this article of reflection are to determine that, in every human act, two aspects (knowledge and love) and two levels (sensitive and intellective) can be distinguished to get good education based on love and on self-realization of the person.

a) Knowledge can be sensitive and intellective, the former is rooted in a body organ and the conditions of matter are reduced to timing, amount and movement. The passage from sensitive to intellectual knowledge depends on sensitivity, it has to take its first data from sensitivity as the proper object of understanding is the essence abstracted from what is sensible. Understanding knows from these essences and through them.
b) Love can also be sensitive and intellective. Sensitive love is linked to sensitive knowledge and relates to goods or purely material values. Intellectual love is linked to intellectual knowledge and, because it extends both to the sensitive and to the suprasensitive, intellectual love also addresses both sensitive and spiritual goods.

These two aspects and levels (sensitive and intellective knowledge and love) are analogous, they access reality, have a reciprocal influence and are closely linked together and this union is achieved in self-realization and love. If these objectives are achieved, we can also say that teaching and learning are internalized and the student acquires a greater choice and deepening capacity.
It should be mentioned that these two objectives result in the affective dimension that is rooted in the person and closely linked to emotions. A key role today in education (Arias, C., 2015)

3. DISCUSSION

Determining these two objectives requires pointing out some important aspects.

3.1. Freedom as an educational key

The person is free because he is capable of self-determination to the multiplicity of alternatives that are offered, because he is able to choose the good he perfects. The most characteristic feature that shows the dignity of man is freedom, the capacity to choice, to want. This is made possible by his knowledge and love, sensitive and intellective.
The implications or consequences of freedom are:

a) Freedom is not independence. Freedom identified with maximum independence is not only an error in the concept of freedom but especially in the concept of man. Man is a constitutively dependent being. He has been given the power to choose from an infinite range of units, but it is impossible for him to do without all of them. We say that free will is all-embracing, and in this context it remains being that way: “man can want what he wants, but must want something. And, at the very time he exercises and updates the possibility of his wanting, at that moment, he is linked to what he wants” (Llano, A., 1983, p. 30-31). This quotation differentiates freedom from independence; on the contrary, it is installed in its antipode because exercised freedom is not independence but linkage. The status of the person exercising freedom –it entails making an election among his many possibilities- is not uprooted, but commitment. To want or not to want; to commit or not to commit: that is the question. In many moments of learning, the student must choose not simply the methodology but the way to carry it out and pursue that application (Journal of Education, 2013)
b) The very act of freedom is love. There is no love without freedom. Wanting freedom is, above all, being open to want more. Wanting more is not identified with some kind of choice, which who mean to want more means, but not the increase of love. The improvement of wanting depends on the fact that the person cannot remain dissatisfied forever. Free decisions do not reach any point if they are not accompanied by love. It is essential that the teacher, when teaching, demonstrates that attention and appreciation in his explanation and education so that students perceive their learning with serenity and thus can rest in their knowledge. Attention and appreciation of the teacher by the student is achieved by the freedom that characterizes human performance and makes it possible, in practice, the self-realization of man. In each act of freedom, in any free choice, it is the person who chooses. So free decision existentially implies a deeper and more comprehensive way than knowledge. In turn, this freedom is accomplished in the election and in the act of love.

In both cases, the involvement of the two sides of intentionality and, therefore, its unity is evident. Consequently, the same unit of the subject is also manifest because, in every act, it is him, in his unitary whole, who performs, promotes and exercises
(Bosch, M., 1997, p. 219). In each act of freedom, one is self-realized. When deciding, everything is put on the decision -past, present and future- of the being, all personal and social importance.
The fact that the will is inclined to the good is logical and does not detract from freedom, as the essence of freedom lies not so much in the choosing capacity as in the way of wanting. “A way of wanting is that the will does not move more than by itself and causes its own act, as it is not necessarily moved by intelligence or by any other internal or external factor” (Bosch, M., 1997, p. 219).
Simple voluntary actions come from a single motive and lead to impulsive action when choosing. The consequences of their action in their purpose in their value against the goal pursued must be taken into account, as it is aimed at achieving a configuration and a way of life with responsibility.
The decision aims to choose but making a preliminary assessment, that is, reflecting on the advantages and disadvantages before making a decision. But knowledge alone is not enough, because there must be the inclination of appetite. Appetite could not choose without prior knowledge, and without volition there would never be an elective act though knowledge of the object were very true.
There is a real elective action when the person is identified, as he carries different behaviors, with the goal set by his purpose. There are two options before making decisions (Lersch, P., 1968, p 240-289.):
On the one hand, regarding the different possibilities of conduct, the decision depends on a certain subject, thanks to the reflection on the consequences of possible behaviors, it reinforces its purpose and importance. In this case, will helps the strongest motive and has only one executive and organizing function, it is not free regarding the decision since it is given to man by the circumstances.
And the second option, will chooses as a chief judge from competing motives and gives preference to one over the other. The concept of responsibility that makes sense only if a specific option compared to other alternatives is accepted appears.
With these two options, it has been tested that knowledge of an object is not enough to select it, and there must be inclination of appetite making the choice and decision, with carries out the free act.
Freedom is not so much to choose from something as to choose something and for something. The eminently positive act of choice that is the essential act that is to want something, while being able to want other things, but not because these other things can be wanted but because what is wanted is good and deserves to be wanted (Bosch, M., 1997, p. 219). That is, freedom is rather wanting than choosing. Will chooses what is good because it wants, and it wants it because it is palatable. And in turn, what is good perfects will, because when will decides what is good, it becomes better.
It is true that good education requires a philosophical process for the teacher really to impinge on and educate the person.

3.2. Love as a proper act of freedom

Freedom is human love that can take place in different ways in different people (eros, friendship, charity). The union of the appetitive and cognitive intentionality reaches its deepest fulfillment in the act of loving. Love involves the whole person, what is loved occupies, fills the lover and integrates him into the absolute dimension that permeates the whole person. He tends to beauty (one loves what is good and beautiful). The difference between what is good and what is beautiful is that beauty is enjoyed and what is good is wanted. One can not only contemplate beauty sensibly but also morally (Bosch, M., 1997, p. 220). That is, the end of man is given by the effectively loving contemplation of truth. So, the act of knowledge that end essentially consists of has the features given by joyful contemplation, which includes effective love. So a correct application in teaching and learning will entail an adaptation of the best methodology for each student.

3.3. Participation of understanding in love

As already seen, real education involves educating with appreciation and attention. The mind has therefore the ability to think, interpret and analyze events and situations critically, by objective observation of reality, knowing how to synthesize and abstract to build personal, subjective and flexible views. It also develops understanding and respect for the opinions and views of others, thus facilitating the formulation of judgments and decisions in a fair way with common sense, taking into account the development of natural intelligence and intentionality.
Love is open to the truth that implies knowing and to the will tending to the good that comes with love. Intellectual love refers to the top level of the human faculties, it makes it possible to know and abstract all that is learned, that is, it is the area where thought processes are performed and, together with the will, carried out.
What is natural in man is the development of his capabilities. This development is aimed at one goal: getting what is the object of these powers. What is natural and proper to man is to reach an end. And the end of man is to perfect, as much as possible, his psychic abilities that, through knowledge and sensitive and intellective love, reach a suitable choice of the truth (through the reason) and the good (through the will).
Intellectual love seeks to know reality and, when it does, it reaches the truth. This may be theoretical and practical. The theoretical truth lies in the fact that science gradually adapts to the reality based on going deeper and, this way, the hypothesis is corrected. Man is not born knowing, the conquest of truth takes time, effort and can never come to know if one does not want.
The theoretical truths become ends or criteria of the action when you choose them as targets. And the practical dimension of truth will be to achieve it, ie, that coherence of theoretical truth through which the mind and reality fit in.
The encounter with the truth is an experience that brands anyone. These encounters can be reflected in seven points:

a) The encounter with the truth can be more or less intense and can have different hues. In all cases, it is some lighting that makes us discover something important that was not known, ie the fact of “understanding”.
b) The reality found as truth moves the person and leads him to address that reality.
c) The immediate consequence is to accept this reality and make it manifest.
d) The truth is a profound and radical experience, it becomes permanent because it transforms and becomes part of oneself.
e) The encounter has another virtuality: the inspiration that is an impulse to exercise my freedom trying to replicate and express the reality with which one has been found, and embody it in one’s life.
f) The person, when he finds the truth, shows a piece of real sense and starts the creative capacity because beauty appears.
g) Between the theoretical truth and practice there is a relationship, that is, between what we think and what we live, between the truths you have for certain and how they influence your behavior.

In this final section we should qualify that, sometimes, this relationship no longer appears as something obvious.
The encounter with the truth is weak, because it does not inspire behavior. Authenticity or coherence is harmony, which not always occurs between the theoretical truth that one has for sure and the practical truth that is reflected in one’s behavior (Yepes, R., 1990, p. 147); therefore there are two evident objections to the existence of truth: what is true to some is not to others; and that all truth is an opinion.

3.4. Love and will

Love is will that is directed toward good. The human nature consists of achieving the good and the truth, which are subject to the specific capabilities of man: intelligence and will. Intelligence must arrange everything for will to choose what is good; that is, intellectual and sensitive knowledge is the beginning, cause and order of all things in the universe. It leads a person to the true good that is accomplished through sensitive and intellectual love that directs the will.
The main characteristics necessary to the good of man (Rojas, E., 2005, p 44-47.):

– Must be individual: which means that it falls on a person and therefore his holder cannot lose it, at least in principle, for something to happen out of it.
– The own good of man is not material. This statement means that happiness lies not in pleasure, wealth, fame, honor, titles or awards, etc .; they all contribute to achieve it but in no way mean that the one possessing all that necessarily feels happy.
– The good always tends to the more perfect. Aristotle puts this good proper to man in the best act of his best power (intelligence) applied to the best object.
– The own good of man demands to be transmitted to others and leads to self- realization.

In Phaedo, Plato says: “If so, I said to myself, the ordering intelligence has arranged everything for the greater good” (Plato, Dialogues Phaedo) This phrase expresses the essential step of the intellectual cause to the metaphysics cause: the good. It analyzes how beauty is identified with the good. The good is revealed to men through beauty and truth. Beauty is a kind of luminous glow through which the good gives an impression on everyone and love leads the person to the vision of the good. The good is also revealed as the principle of knowledge, ie as science and truth. There is an identification of good, beauty and truth.
The intentional act involves the union of intelligence with understanding, sense with what is sensible; the will with what is wanted and appetite with what is sought. And this union is not made in a juxtaposed way, it is not only an encounter of subject and object, an external contact but an identification, and such identification is, so to speak, the finishing of the intentional act. The intention is fulfilled or is finished in this union (Bosch, M., 1997, p 217.)
This means that the more one knows the truth, goodness, beauty; “The person acts according to his own knowledge and gets the will to want to do it because the will means to intend to do something, even if it costs” (Rojas, E., 2005, p. 55) Wanting to move something forward means consenting and being aware that it is good and positive for progress.
The sensitive and intellectual knowledge together with love has a leading role that coordinates and gives meaning to the realm of what is affective and biological. Moreover, it relies on the normal nature of sensitive life. If the intent of these two aspects is adapted to goodness, truth and beauty it will lead to emotions, feelings and sensitive aspects of the person to be under the control of intelligence and will.
The human being is endowed with knowledge and love, for these powers, he is integrated into the environment he lives in, but also has affection that binds their behavior. The three human aspects -rational, volitional and affective or emotional- are totally inseparable; every thought, every decision will have a romantic connotation. In every human action there are feelings, whether of boredom, joy, hope or despair, admiration or illusion. All human action is surrounded by an emotional context.
Affectivity is therefore a unifying aspect of human behavior. “Emotions and feelings could be conceptualized as subjective states of the human being that externalize motivations and desires and show to others and to oneself interior attitudes” (Hut, J., 1990, p. 143)

3.5. Love and feelings

Feelings constructed each one as people when they match reality and truth; but what makes it possible to know reality is intelligence. Psychological well-being has a lot to do with achieving the necessary link between logic and feeling, between emotion and reason. To get that balance right, reason is mainly used because it there is more direct control of it than of emotions. The ability to reason is largely available to everyone, while emotion is imposed, without being able to prevent or control it easily. Emotion and reason are processes that go well together because the emotion-reason balance guarantees the welfare of people.
The proper functioning of the mind requires intellective moderate affective areas to moderate the affective ones. Knowledge captures the truth of things, the truth shows the way to good and that way brings beauty. The influence of reason on feelings must be that knowledge and intellective and sensitive love show what is good to affectivity, so that when perceiving beauty, sensitivity spontaneously leans towards good. The modification of feelings is complex, contemplation becomes necessary; that is, the look on the good that arouses perception of beauty. That is, intelligence must show affection the truth that exists so that, when finding the truth, it perceives what is beautiful and what is good in that reality.
Love can change feelings. This can be done in two ways. First, showing the appearance of beauty that exists in the intelligible good. Then, there is a modulated and aware performance of affectivity that is positive. This ability to model one’s feelings is important in the rational life.
Second, one can force human behavior by acting against one’s feelings. This is the case of the voluntaristic and perfectionistic person walking with his back turned on what he feels, and whose end is usually what the will dictates as a duty. Some students are governed by this criterion and must be taught with a proper application of the methodology and through dialogue.
The key to proper functioning of intelligence together with the will is love that involves this anthropological intent. The person is created to love and this involves living and shaping his life according to that end. It is the individual being who loves, with his unity and wholeness. You love with your body, with your affection, with your intelligence, with your will and with your daily behavior.
“Love is the joyous approval of something and the desire to merge with that object. This is what is repeated: approval “(. Piepper, J., 1976, p 435) This argument put forward by Pieper (1) shows that, when something is approved, what one does is to take for granted that it is good. The approval contained herein is rather the expression of a will. It includes therefore the opposite of “theoretical” neutrality nourished by indifferent detachment. It means agreeing, nodding positively, willingly granting to check something that is wanted, the affirmation of a realized desire; it is to praise the fact, to extol it and even the glorification taxed by the one who talks that way. Therefore, love is to approve and affirm. But what love does is prompt, be inclined and move towards that object that arouses the feeling. At present there are few students who live and explain love as if the person were just body. From that assumption, education for love is reduced to knowledge of how the body works and the reactions produced in it when faced with the different stimuli to which it may be subjected.

(1) Joseph Pieper (1904-1997) was a philosophical anthropology professor at the University of Münster. He was an academician in several fields, a professor an a lecturer invited in the five continents.

From the point of view of personalized education, we can compare this aspect with “autonomy” (Garcia, V., 1970, p. 22) It could be defined as the ability of the person to govern himself. Under this constitutive note, the human being governs his own actions, he is independent and free.
It is true that man is conditioned and therefore depends on physical and mental external and internal factors. But also true is the fact that the human person, in the depths of his being, is not dominated, subdued, determined by the laws governing the physical nature, since he is able to determine himself, to feel and exist thanks to the adequacy of intellective and sensitive knowledge with the truth, and the sensitive and intellective love that goes to what is good (Moreno, 1989, p. 129)

3.6. Affective Education essential for the student

True sensitive and intellective love integrates sex education consisting of two basic questions:

a) To educate affectivity is to educate for love, and this brings about a maturing of feelings.
b) To harness impulses and passions properly, inserting them in the vital project and in the tissue of personality.

Education of affectivity has to be personal. Each student needs to be understood in his nuances and differential aspects, he cannot be seen with a generalizing vision. When one gradually achieves that sex education to be positive, the subject is increasingly able to understand and govern his sexuality, putting it at the service of love to someone else.
Affectivity acts on intelligence and will. Feelings facilitate the performance of intelligence, since knowledge enters more easily into the mind when something satisfies and, then, one remembers better. When the will is supported by the appetite, the voluntary action is more easily performed. Betting with pleasure and illusion even on what is expensive allows us to act with less stress. Feelings can subtract voluntariness from actions but add humanity.
The existence of feelings can lead to doing good; although sometimes it becomes distorted by external agents: physical, social and affective conditions that are regulated through suitable self-knowledge. It is essential to know one’s temperament and how one reacts to life. There are personalities who are primary, they immediately respond to any stimulus. On the other hand, there are secondary personalities that tend to excessive reflection and introversion.
Sensitivity, organic, affective and intellectual maturity is gradually shaped at a different pace in each of the students and we need to attend to each according to his particular way of being and his needs. It requires transforming the sensitive dimension into reliable operating habits because that gives rise to a strong objectivity.
Sensitive dimension accompanies all decisions and all acts. We must be able to discover its value. These and other changes are perceived sentimentally, and they certainly influence when maintaining or changing a decision. It is to acquire the right skills to live fully. When feelings and affections are integrated into will and intelligence, the person can love others and reach adequate and full maturity.
Love is not just a feeling, it is also an operation of the will, ie it can be corrected, enhanced and improved. If love were only feeling, feeling swings of joy, excitement, etc inside oneself, it would be like saying that love comes and goes as it wants. If the subject loses the reference coordinates, the meaning and direction of love is lost.
For this reason, it is imperative to know that a teacher must help students to think and even go further and help shape their own character. “Giving information is easy. Shaping a mind capable of thinking by itself is difficult “(Bruce, R., 2013, p. 71). A good teacher gets to focus love stably and truly.

4. CONCLUSIONS

Then and as a conclusion, bearing in mind the two objectives of this article, we could extract the following points of reflection to carry out good education based on love and self-realization of the person (Lerch, P., 1968, p. 214-240):

a) Love is an act of freedom, it presupposes prior deliberation and subsequent choice. It presupposes the power to choose, to reject, to modulate the activity itself. Thanks to reason and will, man is free. He is also able to govern himself, to move towards a certain place and also to be ratified in his own criteria or even to rectify them. A good teacher looks for what is best in the student and, for this reason, good education with appreciation and attention is based on freedom. The student freely chooses any methodological process if he knows the content and development.
b) Love is much more than a desire, an appetite or a natural inclination. I has such force, is experienced with such passion that you could say that it is lived as a conflict that faces and also binds two people. A commitment to a close relationship with the other’s freedom is thus established.

The freedom of each is engaged in love. Hence this love, the true, the only one that should reside in the human heart is responsible love, which means as much as the fact that it is demanding, certain obligations hovering over the people participating in it (Revista de Occidente, p. 173)
Love leads the industrious person to have each day concrete, realistic goals, cultivating the virtues, strengthening the will, with the decision above all to be faithful to the acquired commitment. For this reason, a teacher who teaches with love will succeed in arousing in the student the best thing he has: his capacity to choose and to love (Fagan, P. F, 2013)
Following these two objectives, the affective dimension that is rooted in love arises. Within this affective dimension are the emotions that introduce their own spontaneous reference in the attitude of the person towards the truth. This emotion is not something subjective as it is rooted in the very nature and in its connection with reality (Bisquerra, 2015)
However, it should be mentioned that the power of intelligence and will on the emotions is not absolute, but political and diplomatic (Aristotle). One has to get emotional energy to be integrated in each of the acts, so that it not only is not a hindrance but is an aid (Miguez, M., 2006). Will comes into play at that moment, limiting to some extent the spontaneous burst of emotional energy, and “coming even to absorb some of that energy; and when it is assimilated properly, that energy significantly increases the energy of the will “(Wojtyla, K., 1982, p. 104)
Knowledge and well-ordered love will lead to full happiness and self-realization of the person. They will consider the other person as a good in itself, as something valuable and of his own kind; You will love the person for his value. When it is known, with intelligence, one achieves that sexuality is integrated into a global project of life which tends to stability due to the close links existing between the sexual dimension of the person and his values.
The sexual instincts perceived by the student are a positive reality. In order to channel them, it is required to teach and train students well in the two mentioned areas - knowledge and love- which regulate the behavior of everyone knowing that sexuality education includes and integrates the whole person. For these reasons, it is good to indicate some positive and possible motivations (Irala, J., 2005, p. 89) in the education of affectivity:

– Training in virtues and values as a foundation for the education of sexuality and affectivity.
– Distinction between love and desire. The latter is only the biological manifestation of love.
– Frequent and specific conversation about sexuality. Open a permanent communication channel between parents and children.
– Offer attractive models to counter some media that exert significant pressure on youth, their behavior and sexual relations among young people.

In short, affective sexual education should achieve several goals: clear knowledge of human sexuality; acceptance of sexuality as good; and due respect to sexuality as a means of personal fulfillment, interpersonal communication and transmission of life (Unesco, 2014). All this is done when the sensitive and intellectual knowledge together with love deepens what is good, true and beautiful; and so gets to properly move psychic abilities for the person to achieve personal fulfillment that is his happiness.
When teaching love, some general principles have to be taken into account:

a) Gradualism. Like nature, there is a process of gradualism since birth (food, sleep, growth, weight, the first words); sex education, should also be gradually adapted to the physical and psychological maturity of the child, to his age and assimilative capacity.
b) Truthfulness. It is essential that sexual information should be performed with accuracy, naturalness, precision and delicacy, without reducing it to mere exposure of biological mechanisms. It is to teach and help assimilate the information received and direct their behavior. Currently, there are many programs around this area though the age of the student, family and an incisive explanation that will help the student grow as a person should be taken into account, since there is a real concern about sex because it is inadvertently being focused in a light and trivial way.
c) Planning. It is convenient to have for each student specific planning for training in this field according to the evolutionary and psychological process of the student. It is an important point that should be emphasized, considering each one together with his parents.
d) Evaluation. It is the next step after planning. It involves collecting discussions with each one and specifying a topic in more depth.
e) Positive sense. We must be convinced that each student has more virtues than defects, and we have to trust that they are capable of the best, motivate and excite them to get what is big, to have them discover the good and learn to savor it.

A true sensitive and intellectual knowledge will come to train anyone in a good choice to love. Every human love begins with an attraction that can be designated by the term “infatuation” (Maurius, A., 1960, p. 52) which is still a vague impersonal emotional desire that inspires pleasant wait but which should not be confused with love –which is wanting the good for the other-. Infatuation is affective, not voluntary. In infatuation, there is a kind of rapture that is a static form of joy. The individual is boosted by the object in an impulse that he experiences like an upward surge of vitality and leads to more intense life.
In love, however, there is a tendency to transcend the individual self, love goes to you as a value of sense. It only intends to exist for the other, to serve his highest chances of value, so it always has an educational element, in the same way that real education is not possible without this kind of love.
“We must learn to create harmony between the will to choose and the three most important emotional experiences: feelings, passions and motivations “(Rojas, E., 1987, p. 24)
In short, educating means to educate in love that involves seeking the intent of the person, achieving self-realization of the person that is accomplished when intelligence knows the truth guiding the will to good. This implies a balance between knowledge and sensitive and intellective love integrated into the person who is present in each of the psychic functions (Martinez, C., 2012)

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